Welcome!!

Once upon a time a boy looked into the eyes of a beautiful browned eyed girl and said "Beth. . .you are the most socially awkward person I know"
Beth gazed with utter astonishment into the blue eyes of the boy and responded, very sweetly,. . ."Look who's talking".

Prompted by the compliment the boy so condescendingly bestowed, Beth felt she should strive and live up to this new 'title'.
And Yet!!! Is this enough??? What shall Beth do with this newly discovered talent?? It must be put to good use.
One day, while stalking boys on facebook, Beth found the solution to her problem, an inspiring quote:
' I don't need to flirt, I will SEDUCE you with my AWKWARDNESS.' Brilliant!!
Here's the Plan: Beth goes to every YSA activity she can find. Then she flirts with Random boys. Perhaps some will be intimidated but she won't let that discourage her. If Beth is not Married or Engaged by her 30th Birthday she solomnly promises to kiss the first boy she meets at Red Lobster. On her birthday.
To follow the adventures of Beth please read the following blog and offer advice and suggestions of how she can develop her talent most efficiently. HURRY she only has 8 years to go.

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Bus Stop

Dear Everyone,

I apologize for not writing the last couple months. I have been busy with my new schedule/job and have not had time to write. But, fortunately for all of you, I've had many noteworthy experiences which I will outline and narrate below.
Enjoy!!

Bus Stop:
With my new job at the Pennsylvania Historical and Museum Commission I have started taking the bus to work. And, consequently, I've met new and exciting people. Hooray! (side note: if you cannot handle adult content and racial slurs I recommend waiting for the next blog entry: The Nerds)
Crazy # 1 (toothless white guy): Sitting on the bus minding my own business and in comes Man on Phone.
mop:"Do you know what my Fiance did?"
me: 'no'
mop: 'she had SEX with another man!'
me: 'that's too bad'
mop: " I got a txt from some man who said he was having SEX with my Fiance! I called my Fiance that if she wasn't having SEX with me I would take that ring and give it to some other Woman who would have SEX with me"
me: 'good luck with that!' (jump off bus).

Crazy #2: (toothless black guy) The CHARMER. . .and me just standing at the bus stop.
TC: (slowly walking around me looking up and down) "Is dat you real hair color?"
me: 'Yes'
TC: 'How old is you?'
me: 'thirty'
TC: 'Oh dat's not so young, but I was hopin' you was a yooouunng lookin' forty cause I woulda ax you out! I's 57, I's to old to ax you out.'
me: 'yes, sir, you are'(or, you is) (hop on bus).

Crazy #3: (Sweet confused white man of about 60) The WAVER.
W: (running up to me) "Hi my name's (blank) I was born in 1922 and I built that house behind you!"
Me: "oh, that's nice"
W: "are you waiting for the bus?"
Me: 'Yes'
(Silence, bus comes, I hop on. Turning slightly I can hear the man shrieking and waving vigorously as the bus pulls out).

Ok so maybe I wasn't the socially awkward in these situations, but honestly, when the most attention you get from men are at the bus stop, I start to question.
MAYBE I AM JUST LIKE THEM???!!!

Love,
Beth


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